on thin ice [openn!]

it was freezing outside, but seven was out nonetheless, willing to brave the cold under several layers of dresses, as well as a comfy purple coat, white rabbit fur hat, and a matching hand muff. why all the effort? ice skating of course!

a small and very rare smile was on seven's face as she bounced towards the lake, her boots crunching loudly in the snow and her skates slung over her shoulder. it was still pretty early in the morning, not even ten yet, but she was wide awake, and it didn't take her long to walk briskly for the iced-over water.

setting her skates and muff next to her on the bench, seven walked tentatively up towards the ice, tapping it with her toe. it was frozen solid, and definitely thick enough to skate on. being a born-and-bred maine-loving girl, seven was always eager to get out on the ice, and was a rather graceful skater despite her rather awkward and coltish build. unlacing her skates and pulling them over her heavy socks and thick skating tights, the little girl laced them with dexterous fingers, her white gloves slowing her down just a little bit as she carefully did up her skates. right, left, and we're good to go.

leaving her boots back on the bench and picking up her muff, seven waited until she had hobbled awkwardly to the ice before sliding her hands into the comfy and warm rabbit fur. once she was steadily on the lake, she slipped her hands into the hand muff, humming quietly to herself as she gracefully took off onto the ice.

she dared not go out too far, being alone and not knowing the other side of the lake well, but rather stayed within thirty feet of the school shore, doing figure eights and skating in loops quietly. outside, nature was absolutely still, and as her cheeks grew rosier the only sound around her was the occasional stirring deer or falling snow bank.

It was very cold outside, but not even a ten foot blizzard could have kept Saffron inside. She was all mixed up inside- literally and figuratively. She'd loved her time with Gerard, and she reflected upon them with a smile at her new charm bracelet, decorated beautifully with the little camera and purple heart. She twisted it around her wrist with a restless finger. But, then, she felt bad about their time, because she hadn't been completely honest. She hadn't told him about her deepest, most secret, most serious worry. That she might be pregnant.

The most horrible thing about it was that when she thought about it, it made sense. Mood swings, she was feeling nauseated a lot, she'd missed her period, and, as she'd learned when she searched symptoms of pregnancy online, that odd soreness she was feeling in her breasts, was another sign of possible pregnancy. But maybe her boobs were just... growing? Saffron frowned, stomping through the snow towards the ice skating rink. She needed some more time to think about this... and maybe she needed a pregnancy test... she wondered how she could sneak getting that done. Maybe she'd stay up a little late tonight...

Upon reaching the ice, Saffron sat her butt down on the snow and slipped her ice skates on. She didn't mind the cold much, and she absolutely adored snow. It tickled her nose when it drifted on top of it, and it tasted sweet on her tongue, like sugary rain drops. She looked up at a noise- a soft smooth sound- skates on ice. She hadn't noticed any one else...

Standing, she pushed herself forward, hands in pockets, toward the girl on the ice. It wasn't someone Saffron knew, though she'd definitely seen the girl before at school.

"Hi," she said, skating up beside her, having no trouble keeping up. She'd skated for years. "Nice day for skating, hm?" Small talk. Oh the joy. Saffron looked off to the side. "I'm Saffron." And I'm desperate for someone to talk to...

seven was startled by a girl next to her very suddenly, and turned her large blue eyes up to the older girl. analysis... clearly extroverted, possibly popular... very pretty, and very interesting name. nice on the tongue. safff-ronnn. potentially nice person, nice enough smile, though seemingly somewhat preoccupied or upset. verdict: be... nice. ugh.

human interaction was not something that seven was admittedly very good at. but, for some reason, she felt that this girl really needed for her to try. several times, the girl opened and shut her mouth, letting the seconds roll by as she gaped like a fish. goodness, she really was horrible at this...

"ahm, it is in fact a nice day for skating..." she said politely, with as close to a smile as she could manage on command. what was the next thing? oh, her name...

"i'm seven. seven briony harriman. though my name is not quite as interesting as yours..." there you go, sevvie girl... make with the small talk. she could manage social situations alright, then, couldn't she?

"what grade are you in? and with what artistic talent were you gifted?" she asked, not realizing how completely awkward it sounded, but simply skating in their little loops, almost content to have the older, prettier, more developed girl next to her. really, saffron was beautiful; she seemed almost to be glowing...

Saffron nodded as the girl responded. Seven... that was a very interesting name. Definitely unique, and for that, it definitely fit this young girl. At first glance Saffron had been able to tell that she wasn't like the others at the school- and maybe it was for that reason that she had been able to approach her so easily. Or maybe it was just that she was desperate for company that wouldn't make her feel like she was under a spotlight- that wouldn't ask questions, wouldn't know her well enough to see a difference in her, wouldn't make her feel guilty and eager to confess something she wasn't even completely sure of yet.

"Thanks," Saffron shrugged lightly as she said it. "Apparently, my father bought my mother a bouquet of saffron when she was in the hospital about to have me, which totally threw her off, because my mother loves lilies. So she was pretty much just like, 'what the hell is this?', and my father, oblivious, was like 'I think it's called saffron.'" Saffron laughed a little. "My name was supposed to be Mary. Thank God for saffron, and my father's ignorance." Saffron couldn't imagine herself with the name Mary. It was just so wrong. She wasn't innocent in just about any way. Although it might have been interesting... if she was pregnant and her name was Mary... hah. "I'm a junior, and photography." She reached into her pocket and pulled Fred out for a second, just so that Seven would see. "It's my life. And you? I'm guessing you're a writer- you speak very well." Saffron had learned from being around Gerard the difference between a writer's speech, and everyone elses'. There was a pretty large gap, and Saffron found herself leaning a little more towards the writer's side with every visit she had with Gerard. "And... seventh grade?" She was bad with guessing ages, but she'd tried anyway. Hopefully she was right... she'd feel a tad bit bad if she wasn't. She hated when people guessed her age wrong. But she couldn't take it back now.

somebody would have named this girl mary? quietly, seven raised her eyebrow, inspecting the older girl more closely. what a waste that would have been... saffron was clever and quirky and.. well, sad it seemed. but she was also fairly inductive. and she thought that seven spoke well! how exciting!

"i think that you would have made a very queer mary..." she said speculatively, not realizing that queer probably held a very different definition for this stranger. "and i am a writer, you guessed correctly. i write plays, mostly but sometimes i'll dabble in prose or even a poem or two. my sister lo writes too, maybe you know her...? eloise harriman? or well, surely you know our father, he's the headmaster for pete's sakes..."

"oh, but, i'm not a seventh grader... i'm in the eighth grade. i know i'm kind of small for my age, though, it's a pretty easy mistake." gracefully she twirled on her skate, skating backwards a little so that she could face saffron, actually enjoying friendly intercourse of conversation with a stranger for the first time in a while. "um... your camera is nice."

Saffron couldn't help but burst into a bit of laughter at the idea of being a "queer Mary." She was sure that the girl hadn't meant queer in the modern interpretation, after all, who would infer that the change of a name would result in the change of sexual preference? It was a little ironic that it was said, still. After all, if she had been a "queer Mary" in the modern interpretation, she definitely wouldn't have been in this particular predicament.

Her smile lingered after her laughter drifted into a sigh. "That's pretty neat. Oh, Eloise, yes!" Saffron nodded. She wasn't very well acquainted with the girl, but she knew her well enough. They didn't travel in the same crowd, you might say, but they still saw plenty of each other in classes and passing and whatnot. And yes, headmaster's daughter then. This day was just filled with irony. Saffron hadn't even thought about it yet, but now her mind was swimming with questions on how the headmaster would react to a pregnant student. Could she get kicked out? God forbid it! She'd never live that down! Her mother would torture her for the rest of her days, a torture which would probably include never being able to see Gerard again. He'd be known forever as the naughty naughty boy who impregnated the tainted flower Saffron. Oh geez... "You probably know my boyfriend then, Gerard?" Saffron's voice was free of the agitation swirling in her mind. At least for the moment. "He's a writer too."

And oh darn, she was wrong. "Oh- my bad. I was always tall for my age- trust me, you haven't the shorter stick." Saffron's smile spread a bit; there was something very classic about the way she'd phrased that last sentence. The haven't, maybe. She liked it- that these literate kids were rubbing off on her. "Thanks," her cheeks brightened with a sort of pride. She pulled Fred out, and held him up, as though to take a picture of Seven. She let him droop for a moment, "You don't mind having your picture taken, do you?" She asked, not wanting to put off her new friend, but very eager now to take the picture, since she had the snapshot pretty much emblazoned into her mind of the girl in her coat and her hat and her skates, skating as she was. It was a beautiful image, really.

obviously this saffron girl was not well acquainted with lola, considering she called her 'eloise'. not that it mattered that much- it's not like seven liked people simply based on whether or not they were friends with her sister. still skating carefully backwards, she watched the girl with the eye of a writer. what an interesting character she would be. maybe the star of her next play...

her boyfriend gerard? oh, yes, of course she knew gerard! "i know gerard!" seven said, smiling genuinely, "he spoils me rotten... like i'm his little sister or something. we met in the hallway and he said 'are you lost?' like some haughty upperclassmen and i just said 'no. are you?'"

"and do you know what he says?" seven said with amusement, sighing and turning back around on the ice. "he says 'i like you. my name is gerard.' hah."

oh, but, what had she asked? she had asked something... looking down at saffron's camera, she remembered at once. picture? she wanted to take her picture? seven was, admittedly, flattered- after all, she'd never modeled for anyone before. weren't models supposed to be pretty? did that mean that saffron thought she was pretty?

under most circumstances, it was almost a given that seven would have said no, absolutely not, i completely profane of cameras and having my picture taken with them. however, seven was just too stunned by this girl asking her to have her picture taken, completely randomly and in this beautiful surroundings, that she couldn't have said no. it wasn't like it was her mother asking for her to please, please just suck it up and smile for two seconds while the camera took her picture... it was someone just wanting to take her picture... well, because.

"my picture?" she said quietly, the phrase still sounding bizarre out loud. "um... no, i wouldn't mind. um, what do you want me to do?"

At first, Saffron's face took to an expression of surprise, eyebrows risen, as the quiet girl exclaimed her knowledge of Gerard's existence. Saffron was increasingly perplexed to hear that this girl was practically his little sister- that he spoiled her nearly to death and all of that. She wondered if Gerard had mentioned her before, and if she just hadn't taken note. Probably... Saffron laughed, whole-heartedly, as Seven described the circumstances upon which she and Gerard had met. The whole scenario sounded very Gerardish. In some ways, Saffron recognized now, so was Seven. But obviously not all. Saffron's boyfriend was never so camera shy. He was completely in love with his visage- never once feared Fred- as it should be, she thought.

"Just be yourself," Saffron smiled warmly; the girl was endearingly nervous- and the color in her cheeks, Saffron could tell, was not the nip of the cold, but the surprise and evident pleasure in the prospect of having been asked to be photographed. Saffron, still gliding across the sleek sheet of ice, had no problem maneuvering Fred as well, angling and adjusting for the best shots. But every captured moment was perfection in Saffron's eyes. She just knew that these photos would be amazing- it was the essence- the soul of it- it was nearly tangible. The innocence of the young girl before her could be seized in her own tainted hands.

Satisfied after maybe ten or so clicks, Saffron let Fred hang down from around her neck and relaxed.

"Those were all gorgeous. I'll give you a copy when I develop them." Develop. Suddenly, she was engulfed by that word. Develop. The question she had so happily forgotten came hurdling back into her mind with the force of fifty other life-changing ones. Was something developing in her? Someone?

Time for a subject change.

"So, you've known Gerard quite a while then?"

be herself? what did that ever mean? be yourself. who was herself? gnawing on her lip contemplatively, seven nervously skated around the ice as saffron skated around her, trying to pretend there wasn't a camera there, and not failing too horribly. it was even kind of exhilarating, really. normally, the little thirteen-year-old was mortally terrified of cameras, but there was just something so enchanting about saffron, and about her wanting, her eagerness even, to take her photograph.

doing small circles, figure eights, looking down at her skates and out into the distance, even at the camera a few times, seven slowly began to melt a little, began to feel kind of excited almost; she even managed a small smile once or twice, despite the pile of nerves her stomach was becoming. clenching and un-clenching her hands in their warmer, seven glided with only the sound of saffron's and her skates and the click of the camera.

after what felt like hours, the older girl let her camera hang slack around her neck, smiling warmly. seven found herself smiling too, and skating back to join up with the girl. what a strange and new sensation this was, being social and friendly. then again, it wasn't as strange as if she were doing the same with someone her age; it was far easier for her to be around older individuals.

"gorgeous?" she breathed with a smile, her nose and cheeks pink and flushed, "y-yes! please do so! "

pleased at the prospect of having "gorgeous" photographs of herself, seven let her mind wander and think how she'd frame them, where she'd put them, whether she would give one to her daddy for her desk, that she got so wrapped up in her plot it took a while, once again, to remember that saffron had prompted her with a question.

when she glanced back at the older girl, she noticed the tangible shift in her facial expressions, and chewed on her lip once more in contemplation. she wasn't quite used to having to cheer someone up, though she was generally quite sensitive to others' gestures and emotions. once again she opened and shut her mouth several times before thinking of something to say.

"i've known him for a while... i guess last year? i couldn't really tell you an exact number..." seven trailed off for a moment, trying desperately to think of something else to keep saffron's mind off whatever it was that was making her face sink.

"so how exactly did a nerd like gerard get a girl like you?"

Saffron felt this kind of odd feeling being around Seven as well. It was like... she wasn't used to getting along with a younger kid, mostly because the only younger kids she was ever around were her aunts' and cousins' bratty snot-nosed children. And they were, in fact, bratty and snot-nosed, all two trillion of them. Okay, not two trillion, but like... twelve, at least. It seemed that Wickersham women were born for three things, ivy league university degrees (they'd hardly end up using), wealthy men (with ivy league university degrees they'd be able to use), and baby-making (requiring no ivy league university degree- or a high school diploma for that matter). She felt like she was destined to be that woman from My Big Fat Greek Wedding. A freaking disappointment. A freaking Wickersham family freak. The black sheep, etc., etc.

Saffron sighed, and tried desperately to clear her mind as Seven pondered on her response to her question; skating around the pond to her backpack, she removed Fred and placed him into the deepest pocket, covered by towels, just in case. Then the reply came, and she nodded, and listened with a smile to the question posed to her.

"It was really a surprise- for the both of us, I think." Reflecting upon it made her smile wider. She turned in one elegant sweeping motion and began to skate backwards as Seven had previously. "It was the best start of any relationship I've had. And I've had four- including Gerard." She rolled her eyes, remembering the first. "My first boyfriend came up to me in the hallway, seventh grade- said, 'hey- you're my girlfriend now' and I said, 'sure'." She laughed at herself and the exaggeratedly low voice she'd given to the speaking part of the boy. "Then- my second, I asked him... pretty bold of me, huh?" She shook her head. "That lasted all of two weeks- and then the third- a total mess- I can hardly remember- I think I was drunk, but shhh, don't tell. Ugh- wish I could take that one back." She scrunched up her face sourly, but the smile soon returned; the fourth was Gerard after all. "Gerard- we've been friends since we met- but at the beginning of this year- we bumped into each other outside- he was trying to write, and I was trying to get a couple good pictures in. It was late... and muddy... raining... and somehow..." Saffron turned and skated forward with increasing speed; then, as though she were twelve again, in ice skating class with the hated Madam Lenka, goddess of the ice, she leaned into the formation of a graceful spin, one toe spinning into the ice, and the rest of her conforming to the rotation, "we ended up kissing..." She slowed and slowly set both feet on the ice. Her smile softened into a sigh. Maybe she'd take up ice skating again... She rather missed it.

"It takes a couple of hits and misses- the whole relationship thing... and I think half the time, the right person is by your side without you even noticing... but it's like... like the perfect triple axel," Again, Saffron took off across the frozen lake. "It may take quite a while to get it right- but once you do," with a commendable amount of thrust, she lifted off the ground, managed three and a half revolutions and returned on the opposite foot. "It's perfection." She turned sharply to look over at Seven, and nearly lost her balance. She threw both her hands forward in an effort to steady herself, and managed it. "Woah- haha, as you can see, things don't always go quite as planned..." Her face was enveloped in pink embarrassment.

the third when she was drunk?! this saffron girl was certainly far different from seven, though perhaps having a sister like lo made her somewhat disillusioned to the social lives of the older students. quietly, as was her nature, she watched the older girl try and explain her relationship to her, her smile widening and bringing a small feeling of relief to the smaller girl. she didn't often care about people's feelings, so now that she'd found someone who she wanted to keep from frowning, it was quite a chore keeping her happy.

seven watched respectfully as saffron did her spins, landing perfectly, though losing her balance a little at the end. she thought that that was a good analogy for this older girl... she could perform as she'd been taught, but in the end she still stumbled, she wasn't completely comfortable.

having been a trained skater herself, as most little girls in those sorts of families are, seven followed suit by speeding up a little, pulling her left hand out of her muff for balance as she kicked up into the air and landing backwards in a pirouette, swinging her leg around gracefully behind her until she was solidly on her two feet. the irony was that, while seven was so awkward and coltish on land, on ice she felt almost at home. she was graceful as a swan when placed in skates.

after some time had passed between them, seven spoke up , her eyes shining in the early morning sun. "i don't care much for boys..." she observed, tucking her hand back into her muff. "they're loud, and often think they are much more of whatever they mean to be than they are..."

"Ha." Saffron understood exactly what Seven was talking about. She circled until she was by the girl's side once again. Had she been into boys at Seven's age? Yes... she thought so. She'd always been into boys, whatever that really meant... she'd always been interested. At first she think she thought of them like some sort of adventure to follow around and study... and then one day... it became less about the strange things they did and more about their faces or hands or eyes... it became about the boy rather than about boys.

"Hold off on guys for a while... they're really nothing but trouble- until you find the right one..." she bit her bottom lip, "and even then it's no picnic all the time... you've got to be careful." Saffron twirled casually around. "So you don't like anyone then?" Her eyes skated over to meet with the girls', she'd smell a lie to this question in an instant. It wasn't easy to lie about this, especially for younger girls. Their faces gave them away- pink betrayal- and even if that didn't- a little squeak in the voice would, or the averting of the eyes... there was always something.

And Saffron wouldn't have been surprised to find that this girl did like someone. It was natural, of course there was that, but even more... Seven was obviously someone who noticed things very well. She had a great level of perception... which would apply to girls and boys alike. She was sure to have seen something she liked in some guy at Harriman. How cute would it be if Saffron could help her realize her little romantic dreams?

No. No, Saffron could hardly handle herself, no helping... though... she should try to learn the whole motherly role... ah- she needed some Tylenol.